ALERT: CAT-ASTROPHIC AUDIO FAILURES ARE SIGNS OF PROGRESS
ALERT: CAT-ASTROPHIC AUDIO FAILURES ARE SIGNS OF PROGRESS
THE FELINE AUDIO CORPS "Under Zorpla's questionable guidance, the cats have been promoted beyond their competence."
STATUS: TRAINING IN PROGRESS
Specialization: Gain Maxing & Butt-on Turning
"Known for introducing 'experimental distortion' by laying directly on the interface."
RANK: Senior Interface Sitter
Operational Profile: Boo is a heavyweight chaos unit.
Zorpla’s Notes: "Excellent. Continue training."
Zepla’s Notes: "Please stop."
Specialization: Mid‑Stream Keyboard Navigation
"Expert at ensuring the broadcast reaches all corners of the Buniverse by walking across the mixer."
RANK: Junior Precision Menace
Operational Profile: Tallulah is a stealth operative. Where Boo uses brute force, Tallulah uses surgical paw strikes — a tap that mutes the mic, a tail flick that changes an input source, a leap that disconnects the only cable that mattered.
Zorpla’s Notes: "Promote immediately."
Zepla’s Notes: "I’m begging you."
This certifies that the Feline Engineers are working.
DO NOT DISTURB.